Like a Breath

O Lord, what is man that you regard him, or the son of man that you think of him? Man is like a breath; his days are like a passing shadow.
Psalm 144:3-4

I will purposefully try not to be as morbid as my 45 years make me with a passage such as this one! But I have seen enough of my life whizz by to know that it is indeed like a breath or a passing shadow. It goes by fast. My kids are growing up, my own life is marked more by concerns of middle age than of my youth, and I see my kids becoming what I once enjoyed. So there is a mellowing that happens. I am not discontent. I am just sort of disengaged from what used to really get me revved up.

I used to worry a lot about my future. But now that I am in it, it is fine, not perfect or extravagant, but peaceful and content. I used to rail against all the powers that be. Now, I see that there is no way to eliminate the painful realities. That is what the gospel and the coming of Jesus is all about. Instead, I have learned to graciously look for the good, take a breath, and wait for what God will do. I am content in the knowledge that God has a plan, even when I don't see it, or like what I am currently experiencing.

My days are a passing shadow. That goes for the good stuff AND the bad stuff. The good stuff lasts all to briefly. But the bad stuff will pass as well. I just need to watch the sliding shadow to know this. And that is comforting and discomforting all at once! I feel a lot like the Preacher in Ecclesiastes. There is good and there is bad and it evens out so that life is bearable, enjoyable, and God is ultimately in control in a good way. So I regard these days.

Little Christmas Cheer

Just wanted to share the sights of Christmas at our home. Merry Christmas to all.

Windows Live: not bad for Microsoft

I am posting this with Windows Live Writer. I recently switched over to Live Mail as well due to my employer switching to nasty Microsoft Outlook Exchange Server for e-mail. I can’t use Outlook 2007 for e-mail because our IT supplier created a fatal chain for me: Exchange Server 2003 with my Outlook 2007 running on my laptop with WinVista Ultimate. The hangup: employer’s provider refuses to write a certificate that WinVista recognizes as safe in this three-way combo/comedy of errors.

 

But Windows Live Mail has IMAP support. I set it up and bingo, it worked FIRST TIME with no issues. Just told me that the site certificate was “iffy”, I clicked OK, and moved on. Only downside is that I have to import in my Google Calendar to a separate Computer at work so that rest of staff can see my Calendar.

 

The Live version of Movie Maker (in beta) is to put it mildly, BLAND. You can do a few transitions and color effects (nothing like the real version), so I don’t recommend it. No titles, no graphics, just editing video down and a few rough stitches to hold scenes together. Not worth the effort in my opinion. Windows Photo gallery Live is pretty decent, and I have not been disappointed with it.

So as much as I resist it, I am again a MicroSlave to Windows.

Prayer is really submission.

Teach me to do your will,
for you are my God!
Let your good Spirit lead me
on a level ground!
Psalm 143:10

This is the kind of personal prayer request that has intense spiritual impact. So many times it seems that my personal praying is gathered around my material comfort. I ask for God to make me "feel" better. I don't really pray much for Him to teach me His will. Most of my praying is an attempt to inform Him of how my life would be so much better if I could just somehow get Him to conform to what I want!

It means something that God is my God. One humbles pride before the great God that is worshiped. If the goal is to get Deity to grant wishes, then one worships no one and instead has a magical view of God as some sort of super-beneficial genie. That is not what prayer is to be. It is not asking for the granting of three wishes, commanding God to give me what I cannot get myself. 

Prayer is primarily a submission. It is a bowing down of the soul and of the pride of the person before an Almighty God. It is a surrender to the all powerful authority, asking that God might show us what we should do for Him. I must remember this.

God,
May I surrender to Your leadership and teaching today. May I know that Your good Spirit is leading me to level ground. May I not be ashamed to be led by Your Word into simple but profound reliance upon You. You know my needs. You know what my heart wants. You know the relief I beg for. But You also know what is best for me and I submit to that no matter it what it means to my wishes or dreams.
Amen.

Perspective on Pain.

For I know that my Redeemer lives,

and at the last he will stand upon the earth. 

And after my skin has been thus destroyed,

yet in my flesh I shall see God,

whom I shall see for myself,

and my eyes shall behold, and not another.

My heart faints within me!
Job 19:25-27

The hope of a life after life with God is what gave Job any kind of perspective to keep him going. There is intense suffering. There is a suffering that makes us want to despair of life altogether. But there is no suffering that every takes away the kind of hope that Job is describing. He is able to sort through all the pains and the poor advice simply because he knew that his Redeemer lives.

When all around crumbles and decays, God is still Who stands on the earth. My life changes. I know this. I have had more medical concerns this year than ever. I have watched my own daughter suffer through depression and the agony of losing hearing in an ear. I have been powerless to help her. She has struggled to see God in any of her current suffering, and all I have are words right now. 

And I cannot help my own decaying flesh. Even now my degenerative discs are killing me as I sit and type. The only relief is to get up and walk around every five minutes or so.

But it is bearable in the light of eternity. Still I have to say, if I was a naturalist, I would check out, because pain is no fun! Yet knowing that it is momentary affliction brings hope and conviction. But the pain and the loss remain, and will probably always do so in the two or three decades that I have left (God willing).

God, I know my eyes will see you. And it makes all this worth it, I believe. Keep me focused with truth until that time. Amen

OK. I am officially moving my blog here.

I used to be located over at journalhome.com.  Well for three days I have been unable to bring them up. I guess they went belly up. No reply to my e-mail to the site admin. So nearly four and a half years of blog archives are caput.  Very sad face.  But I am here. For good.

me