Monday, December 22, 2008

Like a Breath

old man holding breath O Lord, what is man that you regard him, or the son of man that you think of him? Man is like a breath; his days are like a passing shadow.
Psalm 144:3-4

I will purposefully try not to be as morbid as my 45 years make me with a passage such as this one! But I have seen enough of my life whizz by to know that it is indeed like a breath or a passing shadow. It goes by fast. My kids are growing up, my own life is marked more by concerns of middle age than of my youth, and I see my kids becoming what I once enjoyed. So there is a mellowing that happens. I am not discontent. I am just sort of disengaged from what used to really get me revved up.

I used to worry a lot about my future. But now that I am in it, it is fine, not perfect or extravagant, but peaceful and content. I used to rail against all the powers that be. Now, I see that there is no way to eliminate the painful realities. That is what the gospel and the coming of Jesus is all about. Instead, I have learned to graciously look for the good, take a breath, and wait for what God will do. I am content in the knowledge that God has a plan, even when I don't see it, or like what I am currently experiencing.

My days are a passing shadow. That goes for the good stuff AND the bad stuff. The good stuff lasts all to briefly. But the bad stuff will pass as well. I just need to watch the sliding shadow to know this. And that is comforting and discomforting all at once! I feel a lot like the Preacher in Ecclesiastes. There is good and there is bad and it evens out so that life is bearable, enjoyable, and God is ultimately in control in a good way. So I regard these days.

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